How to Care for Yourself During Stressful or Anxious Times | Therapist Tips
What are some ways we can care for ourselves when we’re in a period that feels more stressful, more anxious, or more depressed than usual?
Today I’m going to share some of my own strategies.
The first thing I like to do is get very specific about what I’m experiencing. I try to identify how intense it is, how often it happens, and how long it tends to last.
For example, it might look something like: I’m worrying about something I saw in the news. On a 0–10 scale, where 10 is unbearable, maybe it’s about a 3. It might happen every day after I check the news in the morning or at night, and the worry might last anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour or two. That’s just one example.
Another way I try to get specific is by identifying the thoughts, body sensations, images, or metaphors that capture what I’m going through.
With thoughts, we can look at both the content and the theme. For example, a common anxious thought might be something like: “I said the wrong thing when I was hanging out with people, and now I’m worried they think I’m awkward.”
When I slow down and study the thought, I might notice that I’m thinking about the past. I might also notice the theme: worrying about what other people think of me. Then the thought might jump into the future, like “What if they don’t want to be my friend anymore?” Or it might loop, replaying the same moment over and over again, almost like a whirlpool.
It can be really helpful to pause and study the thought a little—just getting curious about what’s actually happening.
We can also look at body sensations. Is the heart racing? Is there sweating, tension, or a knot in the stomach?
Then there are images and metaphors. Sometimes people say things like, “It feels like there are bees trapped in my head,” or “I feel frozen,” or “I feel stuck or trapped.” Another metaphor might be something like being in a car where the brakes have been cut and it’s rolling downhill. Metaphors often capture an emotional experience in a different way than words alone.
Another helpful step is tracking changes. For example, you might get curious about whether substances are affecting how you feel. This could include tobacco, alcohol, cannabis, or other mind- or mood-altering substances. Simply noticing patterns can be useful. If you have questions or concerns, it’s always a good idea to talk with a doctor or another professional.
You might also track other cyclical or contextual factors. For some people that could be the menstrual cycle. For others it might be things like working overnight shifts or having certain stressful days during the month.
From there, I start thinking about coping strategies.
One area is physical health. Managing medical conditions—things like blood sugar, blood pressure, infections, or other health concerns—can have a real impact on mental health. So it can be helpful to check in with a doctor if something feels off.
Another area is the to-do list. When I’m feeling stressed or overwhelmed, I try to take a careful look at my obligations and ask myself: Where can I scale things back? Sometimes I make a “should” list—everything I feel like I’m supposed to be doing—and then I see what might be able to wait or slide for a while.
I also try to care for myself with time in nature and time connecting with others.
When connecting with others, it’s helpful to notice the difference between seeking support and venting in a way that keeps me stuck in a loop. Sometimes talking things through is helpful. Other times distraction or shifting focus can actually be more regulating if my mind is stuck in a repetitive cycle.
Sleep and rest are another big piece. You can always look up general sleep hygiene tips, but one of the most helpful things for me personally is focusing on the restorative quality of sleep rather than getting frustrated about how many hours I get.
If I have a sleepless night here and there, I try to accept it rather than fight it. For me, recognizing that I can still function even after a rough night helps reduce the frustration—and ironically that often helps me get more rest.
There are also small environmental things that can help: wearing an eye mask to block light, using earplugs to reduce sound, or inviting myself to go to bed earlier. Those are things within my control. Whether I sleep perfectly all night isn’t always in my control, but I can create better conditions for rest.
Another thing I pay attention to is overstimulation.
One way I reduce overstimulation is by doing just one thing at a time. For example, if I’m washing dishes, I might just wash the dishes instead of also listening to a podcast or watching TV. If I’m cooking, I cook. If I’m eating, I try to just eat. If I’m going for a walk, I walk and pay attention to my senses.
A lot of the time we layer activities—music, podcasts, screens—and each layer adds more cognitive input. Our brains are constantly processing that information. By simplifying things and reducing input, we give our minds more space to rest.
Interestingly, when people are stressed, they often increase stimulation. But sometimes what we really need is the opposite: fewer inputs and more quiet space to integrate what we’re experiencing.
Those quiet moments, like showering or walking in silence, are often when insights or clarity show up unexpectedly.
The last piece I’ll mention is social media. I try to be very mindful of what I’m consuming online and how much time I spend with it. Social media can have a real impact on mental health, so it can help to limit time there or swap it out for something else—like reading a book, looking at photography, or spending time with something that feels more grounding or nourishing.
If you find that you need more support identifying coping strategies or navigating a stressful period, therapy can be a helpful place to explore that.